What is your Idol?

So this week at church we are doing the study on Idolatry.
It has been great, specially after spending the weekend with family in IL, and suffering the loss of my grandma on that same weekend.

I have many idols. Just like you. It sometimes presents itself as work, friendships, desire for control, power, beauty, comfort, approval, etc. But among those idols I have found out that family was one of them too.
One of my worst nightmares is to loose a family member. Now, many of you probably have experienced that. I have, more than once. It is hard. We cry, we are sad and depressed, we get scared easily and overprotect. That is all OK. And it is NOT.

It is OK because God created us with feelings and emotions. He, more than anybody knows and understands suffering. Jesus too wept. However, He moved on and refocused on what is ahead, forgetting what was left behind. He looked at the Father again. That is what the Lord wants us to do. Any loss in this world does not mean life can not go on. Any loss that we suffer in this life does not mean we can no longer rejoice and live. When something holds us back...whatever it is, then it is because we have placed that in the throne of our hearts and we are saying that Jesus is not enough. It becomes our idol because our life and feelings depend on it.

What about the family that is still alive? well, they too can be our idol when our world revolves around them. Many times I did not want to make plans until I knew I would be able to spend a great part of my day with my husband. I love him and could not picture my life without him. I know I would not want to live if something happened to him. However, that means I am making him my idol. Everything I said is true and even sounds noble and faithful. But I am not called to be noble and faithful to my husband more than I have to be to my Savior and Lord. My worst nightmare should not be loosing a family member. It should be spending eternity separated from God. Easier said than done. I know.

 The problem is that if we do not take this seriously, little by little, things/people other than Jesus will be sitting on the throne of our hearts. We if don't stop and ask the Lord to examine our hearts and show us if there is any wicked ways (Psalm 139:23-24), then it will catch us unguarded. An idol is not only made of wood. It doesn't take one night  to turn our spouse, children, parents, or anything into our idols. The devil is smart, he knows our weaknesses. He is the father of lies. Therefore, he will know how to trick us into sin. He does it every day. It is up to us, in our free will, to choose who to listen to: The devil or Our Savior, God.

I encourage you to stop and examine your own heart. Be honest with yourself. Pray for God to show you if there is anything wicked in your heart. It may seem as a noble thing, but remember that what looks good to this world, doesn't always look good before God. And finally, I encourage you  to find an accountability partner outside of your spouse (if you are married) or boyfriend. Sometimes the people who love us most are also blinded and can't see our sins.

May the Lord God Almighty be your everything. May you be found righteous before Him, not men.

Love,

FS.

First Round of Tests.

So this past week was Jon's first round of tests. Two on Monday and two on Wednesday.
Before that, I thought he was already studying a lot and I saw him very little.
Well, I was wrong. The week before his tests, I only saw him at dinner time (two hours at the most)
and when we were going to bed (probably an hour before we both fell asleep!).
During the exams week was the same.

Man! and the first year is supposed to be easy! ha! Anyways, it was intense and not being able to work, just imagine how bored I was at times. I would read, go grocery shopping, go to the library, watch some TV, clean the house, go to Bible study, make dinner, and still have way too much time in my hands to spare. Not that it is much different when Jon is home, but at least when he is I have somebody to talk to...or pick up after! lol.

Although his last test was yesterday, he is still studying. That is OK, I know that's what he needs to do in order to succeed in med-school. I am so proud of my husband. He works hard. I am also glad that God has been teaching me to be a better wife.

It isn't easy, in fact, when I think I've got the hang of it, I hit a wall and start being disrespectful towards Jon again. Not by yelling or embarrassing him in front of other. I simply do it with my attitudes. Sometimes I want to punch him! yell at him and tell him all that he is doing wrong. But God in his grace reminds me of His love for me. God reminds me that I am worst than Jon. I do the same exact things to my creator. I bet the Lord many times just wants to yell at me and embarrass me in front of the whole world! But He doesn't. He loves me and forgives me...in fact He even blesses me!

God also reminds me of what He create me for: To be Jon's help meet. Honestly women, we have the toughest job of all. I seriously disagree with you if you think God and the Bible refer to women as inferior or of less worth or less capable! Our job is what keeps this world rolling! the results of our being or not being supportive of our husbands and raising our children or leaving the home will be seen in the next generation. God created us to be that suitable helper our husbands need. It is such a privilege! and such a blessing and joy when we truly live up the role God gave us.

Honestly, I used to be against all that submission and respect and the women be quiet, etc etc etc. But I realize now how many women fight and fight for their "rights" and to be treated as equal as men. They won't respect their husbands, they will look negatively upon men in authority, etc. In exchange of what? to prove something God never denied? that women are as capable, worthy, smart and loved as men are? To prove that they can? OK. Well, prove it. Then what? you are still empty, you are still stressed out, you are not beautiful anymore to men because of your attitudes, you are just a bossy woman who no one can stand. Even more so, you are going against God's heavenly plans for you.

The main reason why I want to submit to my husband and respect him and have him as the head leader of our home is not because I don't think I can do it myself. It is not because I think he is a great husband. It is not because Jon deserves it. I respect my husband and do what the Bible tells me to do because that is what God's heart wants for and from me. I do it because I want to please my God, Lord and Savior. God accepted me just the way I am. Jesus died crucified and humiliated for me. That was my place on the cross. I was supposed to be the one beaten and nailed to a piece of wood. However, God's mercy and grace go beyond our understanding. He loved me (and you) first. He forgives me (and you) over and over and over again. He wants nothing but the best for me...and for you. He did all of that for you and me. Why wouldn't I out of love to my Savior, out of gratefulness to Jesus obey his command of submission and respect to my husband?  I don't care what the world tells me, I don't care if they think being meek and quiet before my husband is a weakness. I know it is not. I only care about what Christ thinks of me. As long as I rejoice in obeying my God, I know I will find true meaning, true worth, true beauty, in Jesus.

I challenge you to think about this and examine your life. Are you worried about pleasing yourself? others? or He who gave his life for you?

With love,
FS.

Created to be His Help Meet. be His Help Meet.

I am reading the book "created to be his help meet" by Debi Pearl.
I absolutely love it.
The book is to encourage women to live up the role that God created us for:
To be our husband's suitable helper.
The book goes in depth of what that means and how women of this age and time
go against what God's plan and order.
For many women, the book will be an insult and rated as sexist,
(even though it is a women who writes it),
for others it may be a challenge to truly seek and follow God's commands
and live up to what he created us for.

I really do not want to say much on this post of what Mrs. Pearl writes about
because I do not have the time or space (and it is against copyrights) to write everything that is on the book. However, I highly recommend the book.
I too, highly recommend that if you decide to read it, do so with a learning heart,
willing to let God speak to you, and with humility.
Do not let the strong words or concepts that don't seem "acceptable" to your
political, self-righteous, feminist ways force you to stop the reading before finishing it all.
The first step towards blindness is not wanting to see.
Unwise is a heart that refuses to learn from others.
It is good to have a critical way of thinking but not to the point of approaching lessons with an already closed mind and closed heart for God to speak to.

I do not ask that you agree with every single word,
but at least pray about it, give it a chance to finish what she has to say.
More than anything, don't let this world's point of view keep you
from experiencing the joy and fulfillment that God has in store for you and your marriage.

I'd lovd to hear your thoughts on the book.
He is good, all the time!! He knows best.

FS.

PS: I am trying to get a group of married women (or women contemplating marriage) to read this book together and study God's word with it. If you are in the Madison/Middleton area let me know if you are interested in joining me. We can learn and discover God's will for wives together!

Update

It has been a month since Jon started Med school.
Like most transitions it was not easy at the beginning. However, now things are starting to take shape
and life is not as miserable! ha! Changes are always hard, but we have made it this far.
He has been able to make a few friends. They are really nice and although from different backgrounds, they have some things in common - besides medical school. Only one of them is married with Children. His kids are adorable. We all went out for dinner last night. It was fun to see them all at the same time and hang out. Although it was mostly the guys talking about med-school, I think we all had a good time. It was just nice to not have them locked in studying all day.

As for me, I am in a bible study at church with the women's ministry on Tuesdays. Jon will come with me on Sundays to the small groups. Hopefully I will make some friends there. It is still hard to make friends. I am glad I have Lani as one, however the fact that she has two wonderful boys and home-schools them takes most of her time. Therefore, I am alone. Sometimes I think I ask for too much in a friend. It is just too difficult for me to actually feel someone is my friend. I hate shallow relationships. It may be cultural, it may be my personality. Nevertheless, I am not as discouraged as before. I have come to understand that God wants me to learn to make Him my best friend before he gives me an earthly best friend. He has given me some in the past...however, the distance and lack of mutual interest on making the friendship a lasting and real one has gotten in the way many times. It is my prayer that my heart will only rely on Jesus and make Him my joy, refuge, my accountability partner, my best friend.

I have also started as a volunteer tutor at the High school. The first day my student did not show up. HA! not really surprised. But I am hopeful for next time. I am excited about this. I will be able to pray for my student and develop a relationship. I know the Lord has me in Middleton for a reason I can't work yet, but I can volunteer like crazy! ha. I have lots of time to pray and develop relationships in which I can shine the light of Jesus. I believe God will use this time to shape me and bless people around me. Here I am. Available. And even when I am busy, I am always available.

This Sunday is Jon's white coat ceremony. Official start for first year medical students. Exciting! :) His parents will come. It will be an emotional day. I am so proud of my husband. God will use him (he is using him already with all his friends) in mighty ways!

Well, that's it for now. I am using Jon's computer. Mine died. That's why I can't write as often :( Hopefully it will be fixed soon.

F.S.