Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Well, Medium or Rare?

Yes, most people ask for well or medium cooked meat. I've had that in mind for the past few days...but not because I am hungry for meat. But because it makes me think of my lack of faith in SO many aspects of life.

This world is trying to take more and more control over people's life. We are trying to take more and more control over our lives. Even us Christians. I see it in the simple things. In things that are not necessarily bad or wrong, but simply a reflection of how much we are allowing the enemy - the devil - to take over our minds and hearts.

Lets put it this way: why do you ask for well cooked meat? why don't you eat the chicken from yesterday? and I will even be bold enough to ask, why do you vaccinate? - Now, your answer will most likely be the correct answer: because I do not want get sick from cow meat, or get salmonella from chicken! and Yes! because I do not want to get and even more so, spread a disease!!! Like I said, all those answers are logical, smart and correct. However, are those answers the only path you walk? do you freak out if you can't have it your way? Jesus never complaint how his food was served. I know, he did not come here to start a health care reform. But that is exactly the point! We live with TONS of fears. Some more reasonable  than others. Yet, we forget why we pray before we eat. In the Bible people pray for food in case it had been offered to other gods...and I am sure they also prayed to not get sick.

I guess what I am trying to say is: we are called to be good stewards of all the good things God has given us. That includes our health, our body, our possetions, our job and even the family He has blessed us with. This means to watch what we eat and excersice and watch that our kids don't get hurt and to be diligent at work, and to not go over the speed limit, and...and..and. You get the picture.

But we MUST be careful not to live in fear. The news of new diseases drive us crazy and we get vaccines for things that only exist in other countries that MOST likely we will never visit or will never get that disease. Seeing little kids being kidnapped or rapped will turn parents into neurotics! specially those who live in the SAFEST neighborhoods :S So many people do not leave their homes anymore...nobody knows their neighbor. All because of fears and us trying to be in control of as much as we can. We know we can't control absolutely everything, but we try to control as much as possible. Is that so wrong? YES when it starts replacing your faith in the One who died to save you. It is wrong when you leave in fear! Even more so when you live in denial of that fear!!

I am not saying that you should not get the shots that you need, or that you should only eat sushi. Not at all. what I am saying is relax, pray, be wise and careful. Do not try to control everything, trust a little more. Let go of your fears.

I must admit, and I believe I have mentioned it in past posts.
Before coming to the USA the only fear about pregnancy I had was giving birth...it will hurt. A lot!. Once here, I noticed how afraid people are of miscarriages. Not that it is not something scary, hurtful and hard to experience. It is 100%. But where I come from, it doesn't happen very often. In fact, I didn't know of any case at all that had not been caused by a mistake of the mother (like carrying a heavy weight for instance). Therefore, that fear was non existing in me.
After hearing so many women talk about it and mourn for so long, it finally got me. It was always on my mind and even when we were just trying to get pregnant, I was scared to death of what could happen. Once I got pregnant, I went on to tell everyone as I would in Peru, right after I find out. I thought that would make the fear go away. It didn't. It made it worst becasue people started asking if we were going to wait to tell more people. That made me even more afraid. I do not know the science behind the why it happens more to American women than to Latinas...I simply know that's how it is. But the fear took over me. I started praying every day for it not to happen. I thought about it every single day. Then, I spoke with my mom and explained to her the cultural differences and of course she was in shock to hear that. She encouraged me not to worry about it, that it would not happen. Yet, that did not take all the fear away. I realized what was going on. Satan had taken over me and was telling me that I myself needed to take control over it and live in fear. I just couldn't believe my mind. I was falling pray of his lies. That "yeah, god loves me but I have to do everything I can to control my life and be safe". The final word from God came through a woman who had had 5 miscarriages. She told her daughter to tell me to not even think about it. Do not live in fear. The baby needs a possitive mommy to grow strong. That was it. Somebody who had gone through it was brave and strong and encouraged me to NOT EVEN THINK about it. Which is how I had lived my life before. Just leaving the unknown to the Lord to take care of, and do my part....my tiny, faithful part.

I am only 8 weeks now and still VERY green let me tell you! ha!. Yet, I do not fear what could happen. I know whatever it is, God will be controlling it, not me. I choose to live and walk by faith in the name of Jesus Christ, who died for me on the cross so that I can have eternal life and be forgiven of my sins.

Life on this earth is not perfect. We get sick, we get fired, our house is flooded, people die, and babies are born or not. God gave us free will. It is up to us to choose to truly trust Him. It is up to us to hand him over the control of our lives. It is up to us to walk by faith. It is up to us to whether have it Well, Medium or Rare.

[Some added explanation of the blog. I never meant for it  to be insensitive or offensive to those who have lost a little angel:

Like I mentioned on the blog: "Not that it is not something scary, hurtful and hard to experience. It is 100%." With that I was stating that it is a hard thing to go through. I did not mean to diminish the harship of it at all. From family members who have had more than two loses I know it was not easy. I also mentioned a woman who had 5. She is a pastor's wife, of course I don't believe she didn't trust. Iknow she did. But my blog was going beyond all that. I talk only about how I and I alone felt about it and the fear it brough on me. I had just read blogs from other women who had lost a child and, to my opinion they were not handling it well. Their blogs didn't show much trust. I did not mean that it was mother's fault to lose the baby either.

The blog was meant for trusting God in everything and knowing that everything that happens in my life is for a reason and that God never left me. It is ok to mourn, be sad, even be angry for a while...but from what I had seen (that is my view of others) it was scary and few talked about the trust that we have in God in spite if the suffering.
  •  
    at all times I am talking about my desicions and feelings and what I had learned and how talking to this woman who had had the loses encouraged me to not be afraid.

  • I am deeply sorry if you in any way shape or form felt that I was being insensitive towards you. That was not my goal. It was totally the opposite.


  • Believe that , many times after what happened to someone close to me I even prayed to go through the same thing so that I could say that I 100% understood you. and when we got pregnant, I understood a little bit but it would never be the same. that why I do not say how people should or shouldn't feel about it. I have no right to say that because I have not experienced it myself. and even if I had, everybody is different. But the blog was more about the fears before it happens.

    I know it was not very smart to pray for something like that...yet, God allows hurtful things to happen in our lives, not because that is his will for us, but because He knows that it will help us grow closer to him and in the case of couples, to each other. Problems in our lives are never God's will for us but He is the one who allows them to happen for a better outcome. Gold can only be as shiny and beautiful after it is put through fire. I am sure that was one of the many purposes of your little angel's life with you and his/her leaving you so soon. His/Her loss was the fire God used to turn you into gold.]
    Next time, I may go with Medium Well, just to be safe (lol).

    Flop.

    Saturday, November 19, 2011

    Second Round of tests!!

    So Jon was over with his second round of exams last week. This time he was a bit more nervous and truly felt the weight of the material that he needed to learn. Every day he came back home feeling completely brain-drained. I was so proud of him though for keeping  up the good work.

    On my end it wasn't awful. I tried to keep my self busy and the excitement of a weekend with the family in Stevens Point was my light at the end of the tunnel!!

    The weekend was quite eventful. A lot of unexpected situations, but it was great to see family and talk about life with them. Jon's bioChem, Cell bio, Epidemiology, etc were not the only tests taking place. I took a pregnancy test and: I am pregnant! I am 5 weeks and very excited. I guess that would be like getting a A! I know it is soon and that most people don't like to share this until after their first trimester...however I am all about the opposite. I think sharing is good because that way I can have a whole army of prayer warriors behind me and the baby's well being. So yes. I ask you to please pray for us and that everything goes well. I too believe that if something were to go wrong, I will already have you all praying for us and be of emotional support. The bible calls the church the body of Christ. We all function better when we work together. So anyways, REJOICE! God is with us through all circumstances. In Him I trust....but yes, we are super excited and wanting to jump up and down all day! :P (there are some people we haven't told yet that we hope to get to soon!)

    Now we are back home and more relaxed. We are looking forward to Thanksgivings and more time with family and the dogs!!! :) We also got a bigger cat cage for Leo and Roswell. They love it!!! it is big enough for both of them to sleep in it. It was so nice to drive back to Middleton without the constant and loud "MEOW!"

    Also on a very happy note, Jon got 100% on his BioChem exam!! :) we were very excited!! Praise the Lord for He was with Jon reminding him of everything he had studied!:)

    Anyways, I am sorry I am not writing as often. My computer isn't working and Jon has his all day at school. It is kind of tough to be inspired just in the two hours that I have the computer at night. Specially when I rather spend more time with my husband than sitting in front of the computer gathering all my new knowledge and thoughts of the day. I can't promise I will write again soon, but I sure I hope!!


    love,

    Flor.



    Thursday, October 27, 2011

    Do NOT sympathize. Encourage!

    Many women LOVE to be told "I know how you feel" or have people reassure them that what they are going through "is tough". It may be the case many times. And it does feel good to have someone understand what you are going through and agree with you on the difficulty of the matter. Sometimes we need that.

    However, more than often it causes more harm than help. If done the wrong way. That is: "Oh gosh! I know what you mean. It is hard, people don't understand. The same happened to me when Sussy asked me to do all this things on top of taking care of my children and keeping the house clean. - I know it must be awful! who does these people think they are to tell you what to do? - They are wrong and can not ask so much from you! - You don't need to show excitement when you see them if you really didn't want to go there on the first place." You can add more of the same. I have used many of those lines and many more thousand times.

    We tend to see things first with our feelings and then with reason (if lucky!). As Christians, we make the same mistakes. We see with our worldly eyes that tell us that "we deserve better".  Our worldly eyes (and hearts of flesh) keep saying that we do not need advice, that we know it all - and if not, we can figure it out by playing martyr on "how tough it is"(you may not even realize that that is what you are doing).

    I am not denying the difficulty of life and different circumstances. I know there are things and stages in life that are harder than others and that we feel overwhelmed. But that is why we have Jesus!! our godly eyes should take us back to the cross!! THAT WAS TOUGH!!! Jesus was the only one who "deserved better". He was the only one who did not have to smile if he did not want to. He was the one who did not need ANY kind of advice. He was the only one who could figure things out on his own!! He was the real martyr. YET, he did not behave as such. He was surrounded by people- He did not have his "personal space" or "privacy". He did not hesitate to smile and hug others. He showed loved 24/7. He obeyed his mother and I am sure he listened to her advice (which, she being a woman, she inevitability might have given him some!). He was a martyr and yet did not behave or thought of himself as such.

    As wives many times we can be dangerous to our husbands if we are not careful. We can sympathize too much. Maybe your husband doesn't like the people in your small group and wants to leave because of that. Well, that is his given earthly right. You do not have to hang out with people you do not enjoy being around. However, we need to be wise and encourage him to look inside his heart and find why he doesn't like them. Make him think about his attitudes. Maybe he hasn't even tried to start a conversation with that person(s). How can he not like somebody he doesn't really know? Avoid speaking against people he doesn't like. In fact, speak kindly of them. Help him look at them through Jesus' eyes. I am sure Jesus could have found MANY excuses not to like somebody.

    Maybe your husband is holding grudges against somebody. Maybe against his boss, his parents, his siblings, the neighbor. I don't know. The bible encourages us to step forward and forgive or ask for forgiveness, even when it is NOT our fault. Do not sympathize with your husband, encourage him to seek reconciliation. It may take that you go with him as moral support. Encourage him to talk about those things. Guys can be very stubborn and try to "just forget about it". That is pride mixed with cowardice. Encourage him with loving words, do not keep saying "I know it is hard". You already said it many times, and he knows it very well. Help him gather the strength instead and face it.

    Last but not least, do not just encourage him with words, do it with your actions. Show him that it is not the end of the world. Life goes on. Everybody has problems, but he has Jesus! Love him dearly. Pray for him, pray with him. Encourage him!!

    F.S.

    Wednesday, October 19, 2011

    Just one question: what can I do for you today?

    I would like to help you in any way I possibly can. It may be with prayers only, a listening ear or something practical I can do for you. I may not be able to help you exactly in the way you want me to, but you never know. You might be surprised. If you dont ask, how will you get? Leave pride aside. We all need something. Allow me to pass on to you the blessings God has given me. Not gold or silver, but of what I have I want to give you.

    F.S